She sits, simply, waiting, for nothing and yet something. Hoping and yet not expecting anything. This place she sits is an unknown chair, in between dreams and reality. It is a place where no one can truly visit and yet there are many who come to see her. She refuses no visitors and yet inviting others will alter her place. This place gives her meaning, a dream, a purpose and promises more to come.
I often feel that this place is too much a part of me and that in truth I am nowhere to be found. A lost soul searching the waters and wasteland for a piece of me that broke off centuries ago. At some point in our lives we all sit in this chair, be it a minute, or an hour or a day. Some choose to sit in it for weeks, and others, well others make it their life and are never truly part of this world. People of this nature are mostly depressed or have a problem with mixing in society. I often find myself in this place, hoping that I will not be sucked in by the cold and yet it is days like this when I feel it has and that there is nothing on this earth I can do about it. There is however.
I heard today that life is uncertain and that you should eat your dessert first. I smiled upon hearing this and realized that I am not in this chair I often put myself in since I often times indulge. So I am a part of this world. I enjoy it and I like to think that it enjoys me too. Bringing life and warmth to the world around me is important and so I often find I need to take cover in a place of refuge. Its depressing to see the world fall again and again, people cry over and over, soldiers dying day in and day out for a lost cause and so we drag ourselves down into this world of helplessness along with the problems of this world that festers hate and delaying our lives because society, or opportunity does not allow us to be free. The russians eat their dessert first. Perhaps this is a clue as to why they often get what they want. If I feel like chocolate instead of food, I will have it. We see so many woman and men deprive themselves of passion and happiness because they made mistakes in life and are too afraid to admit it and move on. Let go and move on. Leave a situation that is killing you or truly make it work. Dessert is for the fit, not the fat, because only the fit can handle it. I have nothing against fat people, most of my family is overweight. Fat people are usually trying to fill a void though, and I can see this is the problem with my family. They avoid facing their emotions and turn to food. Cake isn’t going to fill the void. Love is. An honest truthful look into what you are doing in your life and why will unlock that.
Perhaps all the mistakes I made in the past have to do with having my dessert first as I am one for the sweet. I have no regrets though, because if I hadn’t gone through that journey, I would not have found my savory halloumi pie which I love so much. Once you’ve had your sweet, you are far more open and ready for the salty, and ofcourse you enjoy it more. Salt is necessary for cleansing the wounds. We are all destined for our destiny, no matter what it is or how it will play out. You will get there one way or another, so its best to enjoy the journey there.